Social Anxiety - Are You Just Shy?

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Most people unfamiliar with anxiety see it as just a simple case of the nerves. Those of us who live with anxiety know it is much more than that.

Anxiety is similar to fear, yet very different. Let me explain. Fear is a rational emotional response to a real threat. Anxiety is an irrational emotional response to an imagined threat. However it feels very real to those of us who suffer with anxiety on a daily basis.

Example: Imagine you are walking down a dark deserted road and you turn around to see a man coming at you with a gun. This is real... this is fear.

Now imagine you are walking down a familiar street in broad daylight and you imagine some disaster is about to happen, to you, and without warning. There is no visual threat, it is all imagined, though very real in the mind of a person suffering anxiety. This is imagined... this is anxiety.

Social anxiety or social phobia is often misdiagnosed. Often, you are just labeled as being shy.

"Oh, you are just shy?" Are you sick and tired of hearing that? Are you wondering what is wrong with you? Do you feel like no one understands? You are not alone!

I lived with "shyness" all my life. Everyone told me to just "get over it." I wanted to scream! Something is wrong with me! I can't just get over it!

Then I got older. The problem with my "shyness" got worse. Other symptoms started to arise. Depression, anxiety, panic attacks, agoraphobia, and many others.

If you are still wondering if you are just shy, or if it is something more, maybe this will help.

Do you worry for days, weeks, months about an event you have to attend?
Do you immediately start coming up with excuses not to attend an event?
Do you have an extreme fear of being judged by others?
Do you have extreme fear of talking to strangers?
Do you find it extremely hard to post in forums, newsgroups, use an instant messenger, or any form of conversation online?
Do you find it almost impossible to use the phone?
Do you panic when someone knocks on your door?
Do you even get nauseous and not answer it?
Do you avoid going to the store?

Some of these you may do, some you may not, and there may be other things you do or avoid that is not on this list. It should give you some points to ponder. Notice a couple of key words in the examples above. Extreme and Avoid.

Someone who is shy may blush when meeting someone new. Someone with social anxiety may also blush when meeting someone new. However, this person may also feel nauseous, light headed, and tremble. Their heart might race, they may sweat excessively, their mouth and throat may get extremely dry, they may have panic feelings and want to find the nearest exit.

It is imperative for anyone with these kinds of feelings seek professional assistance.

I have been living with Social Anxiety all of my life, though misdiagnosed until late adulthood. I now share my daily struggles in hopes to help someone along the way. http://anxietymadness.blogspot.com/

Goal Setting - Anxiety & Panic Disorder

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Are you a smart person?

Some of you maybe thinking "I can't be" after all - I suffer with this yucky horrible anxiety and panic attacks each day of my life.

However I can assure you that you are of high intelligence. It was your ability to over think/over analyze and place so much effort into your anxiety and panic attacks that it became a disorder.

It's your every thought of something that makes you feel anxious or panicky that swings to your next "attack".

If you were anything like me - I used to inspect my body for any little changes - and any little changes must mean its CANCER or some other terrible disease I managed to Google last night when I was feeling nauseous, shaky and short of breath.

By the way... it's incredible the amount of horrible diseases you can find for just a few short symptoms typed into your Google browser!

BUT what if you used this energy and time that you give your anxiety and panic disorder and placed the focus on a positive goal you want to achieve?

Say for example - you want to earn an extra $5,000 this year - whether it's for a family holiday or one of them big beefy television sets!!! OR to start a new course, get a degree - whatever it is that your heart truly desires.

Now - you think about this goal EVERY single DAY! You're constantly working towards "how you can achieve this".

What do you think will happen?

I can tell you what will happen - you will gravitate towards your goal. You will *think* less about your anxiety and panic attacks and you will begin to see results! Results that you want!

If you have successfully managed to make your life a living hell with anxiety and panic disorder - (because believe me, I know how much energy you put into keeping it alive) - just imagine how successful you could be if you placed this same amount of energy into achieving your goals! Achieving the things you truly desire and want!

It's only a matter of time before it becomes a habit - so why not make a habit out of achieving your dreams and desires.

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5 Quick Ways To Ease Stress, Depression & Anxiety

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No ceremony with this article, let's go straight into five quick ways that will help you find relief from stress, depression and anxiety.

1. Take regular breaks from the firing line. Working hard without regular breaks is a great way to build up stress and tension. Make sure you have at least one 15-minute break in the morning and one in the afternoon as well as at least 20 minutes for lunch. If possible, eat lunch away from your workstation. Equally, if you have a lot to deal with in your life right now, taking a day, or a weekend elsewhere - longer if you can - to get some breathing space will really help. Even just a day away from the firing line will enable you to get some distance from the problems and help you to gather your thoughts.

2. Regular exercise can help relieve stress, depression and anxiety. Exercise releases endorphins into your system and will give you a natural boost. It will also provide you with a break from brooding and dwelling upon problems and troubles - but only if you perform the right kind of exercises. Avoid: Exercises that allow you to brood (weight lifting, jogging, treadmills) and perform exercises that require your full concentration. Competitive sports such as squash, tennis, badminton and circuit training are all excellent examples. It is important that you do not brood when you exercise because although you will be benefiting physically, you are still stressing yourself mentally and the stress, depression and anxiety will worsen.

3. Stop beating yourself up. Self-deprecation is a huge part of stress, depression and anxiety. Each time you beat up on yourself, you will erode confidence and self-esteem. Never tell yourself you're useless, worthless, stupid, hopeless, boring, ugly, and a loser. Never convince yourself that other people hate you, that others find you difficult to be around and that you're better off being alone. You would never deem it acceptable to say such things to other people and you must deem it equally unacceptable to say them to yourself. These words and phrases are powerful and they will hurt you. Accept you're not perfect and that you make mistakes - just like everybody else does - and cut yourself some slack. From this day, make a pact with me to never indulge self-deprecation ever again. IT IS UNACCEPTABLE.

4. Isolation is another problem experienced by stress, depression and anxiety sufferers. OK, there will be times when you just want your own company. During such times, you can brood over and over again on problems and events and beat yourself up for hours on end. Not good. Instead, use isolation more positively. Occupy your mind by tackling a jigsaw puzzle, a logic problem, a crossword, read a book or perform a hobby such as painting, playing a musical instrument or whatever it is you have an interest in. In this way, isolation will help you to grow instead of causing you further pain.

5. Television, radio and newspapers can all supply you with a daily hit of negativity and help lower your mood. In the main, they concentrate on the negative side of life: crime, corruption, war, scandal and natural disasters and can give you a distorted view of reality. Not to mention the amount of image manipulation they subject you to. Give yourself a break from this negative drip feed and avoid them completely for one week. You may find, like I have, that they have no place in your life after that. Trust me, you won't miss them.

That's five, quick tips for you to help fight stress, depression and anxiety. Please give them a try, they'll all help to boost your mood levels very quickly indeed.

Former anxiety sufferer Chris Green is the author of "Conquering Stress", the internationally acclaimed program which will help you to permanently conquer stress, depression and anxiety without taking powerful drugs. For a free mini course, please click here => http://www.conqueringstress.com