Test Your Anxiety Response

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Worries and anxieties are part of our life. The difference between us is our response to any event. The cause may be common, but the response may vary widely. Some anxiety and worry is good. Otherwise we cannot save ourselves. Fear is one of our defense mechanisms. It is fear of death that stops us walking on a highway. Fear, worry and anxiety are related. Let us examine and quiz ourselves about our anxiety response. Too much anxiety can stop us from working. How to quiz ourselves about our anxiety response? Let us find out.

We are said to feel anxiety when we are apprehensive about future and fear what may happen. All of us experience lot of anxiety when we are to go for a surgery. Such events create maximum anxiety. Should every situation make us feel anxious? The answer is no. Are you an anxious person? Do you experience more anxiety then your friends in the same situation? If yes, it is time that you rethink about yourself.

Quiz yourself about anxiety. For example, you may to get up early than usual and reach for a very important appointment or work. Few of us will have no anxiety about that, but some of us will not be able to fall asleep because of anxiety. They are worried that they may not get up early and not reach in time. This anxiety causes more damage than benefiting us. Such common anxiety must be eliminated. Quiz yourself about different situations and compare your anxiety response with others. If you are responding with higher level of anxiety, reduce it with conscious effort. Try this fun quiz to know about your anxiety and other personality traits. Can you beat anxiety? and How well do you handle a crisis?

Latent Anxiety Releases Perception CD

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FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

IIja Rosendahl Creates A Stand Alone D.Y.I. Recording

Los Angeles, CA--April 10, 2006--German born IIja Rosendahl has a dream, he wants to receive the respect and attention he deserves from people that care about his music. That is what nearly every artist seeks yet it is so difficult to find because of the fierce competition in independent music.

With the new Latent Anxiety release, Perception, there is very strong chance that Rosendahl will reach his goals. The title says it all; this music is about how you perceive your world. Even with the law of averages and the many obstacles that you may have to overcome, you still have endless opportunity. With the right attitude and some talent, things can happen.

In 2001, IIja began playing guitar in a self-educated way then switched to the electric guitar shortly thereafter, which makes his accomplishments even more astonishing. He put together an incredible album, which also includes his first songs created with a 4-track recorder and a drum computer. When you stop and think about how simplistic that is then listen to Perception, you will find it hard to believe that this is how some of the recordings came together. Each track on the album stands alone and you will find value in every one. With memorable cuts such as "Cold As Ice" and "Fading Away," which serve as superb representations of his style, powerful guitar playing, and vocal prowess, this music is hard to forget. The most interesting thing about this music, besides the way it came together, is its versatility and sturdy cross over ability. Being an 80's child brings out a certain stylistic approach and influences from bands such as Depeche Mode, INXS, U2, Sisters of Mercy, Iron Maiden, Van Halen, Duran Duran, Simple Minds, and Roxy Music come to mind. The cross section of tastes spans a wide range and that is exactly what you will hear on Perception. There are some parallels to IIja's other talents he has at his command, he can speak five different languages, and at times, sounds like an entirely different vocalist from track to track. In the end, the language he speaks is universal, and it is all wrapped up in a nice package inside the music.

Perception is everything in life so when you hear this rocking rock-electronica-progressive-chill out you will be pleased and most certainly be back for a second helping.

Contact:
Latent Anxiety c/o Delvian Records
Ilja Rosendahl/Benjamin van der Wel
Address: 1270 Springbrook Road, Suite H, Walnut Creek, CA 94597-3995
Tel: 925-256-1770
Fax: 925-256-1774
Email
Website
iTunes Link

PR Created and Distributed By MuzikReviews.com

Keith "MuzikMan" Hannaleck conducts interviews, writes reviews, biographies, press releases and articles for Independent and Major artists Worldwide. Articles are dispersed on a vast network of websites. Links to sites with great music content are provided on Homepage and Links Page

Effective Recognition Of General Anxiety Disorder

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General Anxiety Disorder affects approximately 1 in 20 people across the world and can have mentally crippling effects. The worst sufferers are virtually unable to leave their home let alone perform required tasks like working or shopping. They live in constant fear of rejection and feel that they don't fit in normal everyday society. it can sometimes be mistaken for paranoia, because paranoid feelings are a symptom of this illness. Even the slightest thing can trigger a reaction that many would consider to be over the top. Meetings at work or meetings with teachers are not merely an inconvenience but a reason for panic and worry. General Anxiety Disorder can make people very ill in the long run because they essentially burnout.

general Anxiety Disorder causes people to become very irritable. This is not only because of a lack of sleep and the onslaught of fatigue but also because many patients believe that people laugh at them. This feeling can make the most innocuous question seem like a challenge.

Sufferers will struggle to concentrate on anything and may lose interest in things they previously found entertaining. This is true of patients who develop General Anxiety Disorder.

Fatigue is very closely associated to general Anxiety Disorder because sufferers struggle to sleep and struggle to wind down. They are always worrying about things, no matter how small or large the problems are. Night times are the worst time of all because there is nothing else to take the sufferers mind off the problem.

Most symptoms of General Anxiety Disorder are behavioral symptoms and can be difficult to spot by people who are not closely involved with the patient. Often these symptoms are attributed to a person's character and the fact that they have a mental illness is ignored. There are some physical symptoms too but these are usually due to the mental symptoms in the first place.John Mancini has been writing about Anxiety Disorder online and offline for a long time. Visit http://anxiety-disorders-home.info or http://stop-anxiety-attacks.com to read more about matters like anxiety disorder symptoms and separation anxiety disorder.

Separation Anxiety

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It's tough to handle. One day, you have a perfectly happy, social baby, who knows no strangers. The next day, she won't tolerate anyone but you. Sometimes, not even her father. It's separation anxiety, and it is perfectly normal. And, it's temporary, so no need to fret.

Separation anxiety usually comes in two forms - daytime - meaning your child doesn't like strangers and only wants you, and nighttime, when your child has restless sleep because of being separated from you.

Nighttime separation can be easier to alleviate, since there is not a fear of a stranger, just the fear of being away from you. If your child who used to sleep through the night starts waking up regularly at around one year of age, it's probably separation anxiety. Try spending a little extra time with him just before bedtime, rocking, singing or cuddling. Give him your undivided attention for half an hour and you may find that he sleeps better during the night. This is particularly important on days when he has been away from you most of the day.

Separation anxiety during the day is a combination of not wanted to be separated and a fear of strangers, even when the strangers aren't really strangers at all. In particular, your baby probably raises quite a fuss when you decide to leave him with a sitter. One thing you need to realize is that this is partly a manipulation tactic, and partly just because he is so attached to you that he never wants you to leave. More than likely the crying stops the minute you are out of sight, because your little one realizes that there is no further point in crying, because his audience is gone.

There are a few things you can do to make this parting easier. The first is to always have the sitter come a little while before you have to leave. Not only does this give you a little time to get ready, but it allows the baby to get comfortable with his caretaker. The second and most important thing is to always say goodbye to your child. Trying to sneak out to avoid the fuss will only cause more harm in the long run. Your baby might come to think that you could leave at any moment with no warning. Thirdly, don't make a long ordeal of leaving. Tell your baby goodbye, kiss him and remind him that you'll be home soon and he'll have fun with the sitter for a little while. Then leave. Don't keep coming back in to calm him. Just leave. The longer you let it go on, the more hysterical he'll become.

Separation anxiety generally lasts for a few months, and then fades away. It is a normal stage of development, and though it can be heart wrenching for you, it is a sign of healthy emotional development, because it is a sign of bonding. So, take a deep breath, and go on a date with your husband. It's good for everyone involved!

Sarah is a 41 year old wife and mother of two boys and one girl. She spent many years as a manager in the corporate world, and gave it up to be a stay at home mom.

Go to http://www.infantresources.com now and get her incredible baby minicourse - absolutely free.

Does Social Anxiety Hold You Back?

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Publishing Guidelines: You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, as long as the resource box is included with a live link to my site. A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated.

Title: DOES SOCIAL ANXIETY HOLD YOU BACK? Author: Dave Turo-Shields, ACSW, LCSW Email: mailto:editor@overcoming-depression.com copyright: by Dave Turo-Shields, ACSW, LCSW Web Address: http://www.Overcoming-Depression.com Word Count: 631
Category: Self-Help

Does Social Anxiety Hold You Back?

In the "Anxiety Disorders" section of the manual entitled "Diagnostic Criteria from DSM IV," which is used for the diagnosis of mental health conditions, there are 12 anxiety diagnoses covered.

The fifth, and what may appear to be a soft diagnosis, is Social
Phobia (Social Anxiety Disorder). In contrast to "Posttraumatic Stress Disorder," "Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder" and "Panic Disorder" this diagnosis may seem to be lighter than the rest.

Please don't be fooled by names or the sound of names or even the fact that many of the others have achieved more press time. Social phobia is a very real threat to the quality of life for many individuals.

What is Social Anxiety Disorder? Glad you asked. Following is a list of life areas impacted by social anxiety --

1. Meeting new people
2. Answering the door
3. Interacting with merchant clerks at banks, grocery stores etc.
3. Setting appointments with doctors offices etc. 4. Attending church
5. Buying or returning items at retail outlets 6. Sick days where your anxiety has made you sick 7. Driving (fear other drivers looking at or thinking of you)
8. Paying at the gas station 9. Eating in front of other people 10. Signing your name in front of others 11. Attending or hosting social events 12. Dating
13. Talking in a small or large group 14. Expressing your opinion 15. Performance situations, such as playing on an athletic team, singing in a choir etc. 16. May or may not have panic attacks 17. Fear of what others are thinking of you 18. Fear of being embarrassed or humiliated

Next is a general physical symptom list of the physical signs of
social anxiety --

1. Blushing
2. Sweating
3. Dizziness
4. Heart palpitations
5. Muscle tension
6. Dry mouth
7. Shaking
8. Nausea
9. Diarrhea
10. Headache

These are a few of the symptoms of social anxiety as experienced
in life areas and physically. Many folks have social anxiety but do not realize that this is what they struggle with. Oftentimes thinking about or engaging in any of the activities listed above will induce anxiety.

The real danger with this disorder is that it can subtly grow into a monster. Left unattended, social anxiety can reshape the life that you should be living into one that is centered around avoidance of anxiety. Some of you are aware that you have anxiety and fight with it constantly. Many others are not aware of anxiety as the culprit, even though it's impacting all these life areas. That's powerful!

Ongoing social anxiety can result in developing a pattern of avoidance, whereby you begin putting off many of life's activities. Too often, you have only the best of excuses, but if you suffer from social anxiety, it's really anxiety driving your life's bus.

There are many keys in the overcoming of anxiety. At the top is bolstering your self-confidence. Ironically enough, the more withdrawn you become while feeing anxious and avoiding activities, the stronger the social anxiety becomes.

A FEW KEY AREAS TO TARGET IN OVERCOMING SOCIAL ANXIETY:

1. Participate in activities which increase esteem and a sense of personal safety

2. Establish an area of expertise or mastery and allowing those abilities to be present in anxiety situations

3. Learn relaxation strategies that become serenity-hygiene habits

4. Challenge irrational thought patterns that support the anxiety

5. Keep an anxiety scale journal to chart goals and progress

6. Seek a caring individual to hold you accountable to your goals

7. Know that peace and anxiety cannot exist at the same time. Any ritual which brings peace into your life is a great tool to use to eliminate anxiety

8. Practice knowing that you are loved and have a right to live a joy-filled life!

This is your life! If you find yourself angry over being anxious, that's GOOD -- but only if you direct your anger at anxiety and allow it to become an energizer in your efforts to reclaim your life.

Dave Turo-Shields, ACSW, LCSW is an author, university faculty member, success coach and veteran psychotherapist whose passion is guiding others to their own success in life. For weekly doses of the webs HOTTEST success tips, sign up for Daves powerful Feeling Great! ezine at http://www.Overcoming-Depression.com

Winning My Battle With Anxiety

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Bois

Winning My Battle With Anxiety

I was very outgoing as a child. I'd put on plays in front of my parents, sing to records and put on shows. I was like that all through both elementary school and high school. Nothing scared me and my aspirations were high.

I began college as a Theater major and switched midstream to a Communications major. I pictured myself as the next big 'News Anchor'. I'd even auditioned at the Connecticut School of Broadcasting, impromptu, and got accepted.

At the age of twenty, during my sophomore year in college, I lost most of the sight in my left eye. To say I was frightened is an understatement. I was terrified. But, I handled it like a trooper, even on those nights when I was alone in the hospital not knowing what was wrong with me. When family visited, I appeared strong. At night, I cried alone.

Shortly after I got out of the hospital I went to see a stage production of "Fiddler on the Roof". I remember it well because that was the first of many, many terrifying experiences. It was when I had my first anxiety attack.

During the show, my heart began racing so fast I thought I was dying. My chest constricted and I couldn't get enough air. I hyper-ventilated. The more I panicked, the worse it got. I ran up the isle of the theater and headed straight for the phone. I needed to talk to my parents. I didn't know why, but their voices were what I needed to hear. I thought I was going crazy.

Immediately, my doctor was contacted to see if any of the medications I was given for my detached retina were the cause. The answer was no. I was told to go home and lay down.

The subject wasn't brought up again, but I suffered the attacks in agonizing silence.

About seven months after my loss of site, I was out with my fianc, (at the time). Suddenly, I couldn't see with BOTH eyes open. My heart began to race again as we rushed to the hospital. By the time we arrived, my verbal and motor skills were gone and the entire left side of my body was numb. You could have cut off my left arm and I wouldn't have felt it. I was screaming inside but when the nurse asked me to describe what I was feeling, all I could get out was, "Bah, Ah." I couldn't form any words, (although I knew what I wanted to say), and I thought for certain that either I was having a stroke or was going to die of a brain tumor.

Well, fortunately, I was diagnosed with what's called a "classic migraine", which impairs verbal and motor skills. I regained those in about twenty minutes and then I got the worst headache I'd ever had in my life. The doctor said it was stress induced. It hasn't happened since, thank God.

And that was that.

As time went by my attacks came in cycles. They subsided for some time while in college, but shortly after I got married they seemed to come "out of the blue". Not often, but each time they were frightening. I didn't know then what I know now, and as I reflect back, I can see where I literally talked myself into a worse frenzy.

I didn't have the courage to seek any help. I thought this was something I just had to live with. I'd been examined by doctors for my eye and for the classic migraine and all of the test results said I was just fine.

So, I went on with my life.

At 25 I suffered a miscarriage. The baby didn't abort itself, it died in my womb and the doctors had to remove it. I was sixteen weeks pregnant at the time. When I got home from the hospital, I wanted to grieve, but my husband, (at the time), and I were on different wavelengths. He thought I should get on with it and over it, and I just couldn't let go of my loss or my grief. That's when my anxiety attacks came back with a vengeance. I had heart palpitations that were so frightening I thought I'd have a heart attack. I worked for a ski area and commuted to New Hampshire, many times driving several hours alone, on weekends and suffered some horrific anxiety attacks while driving. He, (my ex-husband), didn't really understand what was going on with me or sympathize very much. I can't blame him for not understanding it, but it didn't make it easier.

I kept it inside. And it festered.

At the age of twenty seven my husband and I split up. My anxiety attacks grew worse and worse until it almost got to the point where I couldn't function. But, I forced myself to. I went to work, I drove even when my hands were so numb I couldn't feel them, and I talked to people when inside it took every ounce of strength I had to appear "normal". It was exhausting.

I was petrified. I couldn't eat alone for fear I'd choke. I couldn't eat in restaurants for fear of embarrassment. I'd stare at a plate of food and literally be starving -- unable to get it down.

The advent of my divorce really was the catalyst to my first encounter with professional help. What originally was to be marriage counseling turned out to be individual talk therapy. I knew my marriage was over, but the anxiety needed to be dealt with and this proved to be the beginning of my journey.

Adjusting after the divorce along with dealing with my anxiety attacks was quite challenging. It was very multi-layered. I found that talk therapy helped. Not just with the divorce, but with the anxiety.

The talk therapy ended after about a year and a half when my therapist moved to another state. However, the knowledge and insight I gained was invaluable and put me on the path to recovery.

In the years that passed, I had my bouts with anxiety. I did extensive research on the subject and read countless self help books. I was always reaching for more answers; for more assurance. As a result, I knew better how to deal with the attacks. The negative self talk and the fear of loss of control diminished as I developed the ability to handle the attacks with my mind by gently talking my way through them.

They didn't completely go away, however.

In 1996 I met my fianc. One of the biggest challenges he helped me to meet, unknowingly, was facing my anxiety. He is a pilot and on one of our very first dates, he surprised me with a trip to the airport to take his plane for a flight.

As my heart raced madly, (for I'd never been on a smaller plane), I decided to face my fear. That flight was one of the most beautiful things I've ever experienced. Had I succumbed to my fear, I would never have seen the beautiful moon and stars on that clear and magical night. That taught me a wonderful lesson. I was stronger than my anxiety. I just needed to draw upon my strength.

In 1997 I went to a new primary doctor for severe intestinal pain. Upon examination, she told me that I had a stomach condition caused by Chronic Anxiety Disorder. She had only a brief idea of my history. But, after several questions, etc., she wisely came to her diagnosis. It was then that I began some more talk therapy, on her advise, and started taking a small amount of medicine, called Klonopin, to relieve some of the symptoms of anxiety.

In 1997 I became the lead singer of a wedding band. During my audition my anxiety got so bad that I could feel my knees knocking and my lips were tingling! Try singing like that! But, somehow I made it through and got in. There was more than one "gig" where I'd feel my hands and mouth get "tingly" and my legs would begin to buckle. But, I went on and made myself do it. I think that it pushed me further into discovering my own inner strength. If I could handle an anxiety attack in front of three hundred people, (and believe me, it wasn't easy as I clung to the microphone stand to hold me up), then I could conquer this!

In the years that have passed, I have continued my research on anxiety. I still read many books dealing with the subject and put into practice many of the psychological things that help keep anxiety attacks at bay and/or under control.

I no longer use talk therapy, but what I learned in the process will stay with me forever.

It's not a battle that's won overnight, although the disorder seems to appear overnight. The road is long, and there are many ways to effectively treat anxiety. I think the most important things in helping a sufferer of anxiety are the support of those who love you, understanding the disorder, the faith that you will overcome it and the knowledge that you are not alone in your struggle.

Believe me, you are not.

Anxiety: A Very Real Threat to a Happy Life

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Anxiety is the most frequently occurring mental health disorder in the United States, according to the US Surgeon General. There are millions of people who are diagnosed with it every year. A small amount of anxiety helps to get us going, but when it becomes more severe, it can be overwhelming. If you start feeling like it's more than it should be, you may want to visit a doctor for a clinical diagnosis. The National Institute of Mental Health (NIMH) has estimated that 19 million Americans aged 18 to 54 suffer from anxiety disorder every year.

Fear is generally the basis for anxiety disorders. All of us have felt its tingle before we do something that makes us nervous, such as making a public speech or going out on a first date. When that feeling becomes more constant and starts to invade our daily lives, then it has become a disorder and it's time to get some help.

One of the most familiar and studied forms of anxiety disorder is the panic attack. The patient usually feels his or her heart race and also pain or pressure in the chest. Generalized anxiety disorder is another of the more commonly diagnosed forms. It manifests as constant worry that is beyond normal bounds. Other symptoms include a lengthy event lasting six months or longer, muscle tension, difficulty staying focused on a subject, trouble sleeping, and feeling continuously irritated. Panic attacks don't usually result from general anxiety disorder, but it can still make life difficult. That type of worry is exhausting, takes away interest in one's life, and can cause mood swings. Some other anxiety disorders include social anxiety, obsessive compulsive behavior, various phobias, and post- traumatic stress syndrome.

Diagnosing these disorders is not easy as they incorporate brain functions and there is still a lot to be learned about them. No one in the medical profession has yet learned why a particular person's fear response is amplified so much more than another's. Researchers do know that five neurotransmitters become disturbed in these disorders and medications have been developed to treat them. They include anti-depressants and anti- anxiety drugs.

Thankfully there are a number of options for treating and even curing anxiety disorders. Western medicine relies on medications and psychotherapy. Some people see two practitioners: a psychologist to counsel with, and a psychiatrist for prescription medication. This combination of treatments can be quite effective. Tranquilizers from the class called "benzodiazepines" are often prescribed and often work quite well. Some of these brand names are Xanax, Valium, and Ativan and they help those suffering from panic and anxiety. Most of these aren't to be used for the long-term. Anti-depressants have proven more effective for those with acute anxiety disorders. The best ones seem to be the selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors (SSRI) s. Some of these are Celexa, Zoloft, Prozac, and Paxil.

There are a number of alternative medicines being practiced today and some people prefer not to take pharmaceuticals. If you are in this category it may take trial and error as well as time and patience to find relief. Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) is an approach that zeroes in on the thought processes that cause us to worry. Its goal is to help separate realistic thoughts from those that are overblown. Some other things to try are relaxation training, desensitization, breathing, meditating, acupuncture, homeopathy, and biofeedback. Massage therapy, chiropractics, and just walking can also be of help.

Nansia Ressi is the editor of Pharmacy Lane,
LLP - a guide to pharmaceutical resources on the internet. To read more of Nansia's work, please visit: http://www.pharmacylane.com

Relieving Christmas Anxiety for Children

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For a child, Christmas is the most exciting holiday of all. They look forward to the Christmas tree, lights, presents, stockings, make-believe Santa Claus, wishlists, snowmen & many more aspects. It is easy for adults to forget how excited children become when the arrival of Christmas draws near. Of course the children only seem to think about the presents, but it is actually more than that. What child doesn't enjoy visiting a store just to watch a toy train go around and around the fake Christmas tree? What about the snow and the snowmen they build? Or the lights that blink or sing songs? Maybe it is the cookies grandma makes? Or Aunt Lily's beef roast? Or the warm pajamas they are in when they run down to check what it is their stockings? Or is it the enchanting story about the newborn long ago who was actually the Son of God?
Whatever the case may be, Christmas is the most exciting holiday for most youngsters. It is a combination of magic (lights, snowmen, snowflakes, etc), family, good food, presents & stories. Everyone remembers how important the holiday was to them once, but somehow we have forgotten how wonderful it really is. Rather than worrying about what present we are going to buy Aunt Martha, we should be enjoying the holiday. Why not take Johnny & go sledding today?

This is why it is crucial that we get all of our holiday shopping done early. I usually start my shopping in September, and I like to have most presents bought by the 1st of December. This way, I can relax during the wonderful holiday. Why not create memories instead of sharing your stress? If you enjoy the holiday, your child will enjoy it ten times more.

Create a plan which will acomplish two tasks. The first "task" your plan will accomplish is to help your child wait for Christmas. The second and most important goal is that it will help you remember why the holiday is so special. Remember that fun time with your child doesn't have to cost money. Create a plan to do one special thing every day for the 24 days before Christmas (starting December 25th). Your plan may look like the following:

1. Make homemade Christmas cards with your child and mail them to grandparents. Maybe incluce a photo of your child.

2. Make a Christmas wishlist with your child and mail it to the relatives.

3. Build a Snowman with your child or have a snow fight.

4. Make homemade Christmas ornaments.

5. Set up the Nativity and read the story of Jesus. Let your child "act out the story" with the figurines.

6. Make Christmas cookies or fudge with your child.

7. Go to the store and let your child pick out a gift to give to the needy.

8. Create a relaxing atmosphere. Turn off all of the lights except the Chritmas tree lights. Then use candles and/or a fire in the fireplace to create a warm enviroment. Make some apple cider or hot cocoa. Then spend the evening reading stories to your child.

9. Wrap presents with your child and put them under the tree.

10. Go out to eat. Let your child choose where you plan to eat.

11. Put together a puzzle with your child.

12. Teach your child a new card game.

13. Go to a Movie Theater & Buy a big tub of buttered popcorn. (It's ok. Indulge yourself). Can't afford the Movie Theatre? Make up a pretend movie theatre at home! Make popcorn, rent a movie and use fake money & fake paper movie tickets.

14. Visit a grandparents house.

15. Make your child's favorite meal.

16. Make paper snowflakes together and hang them in the window.

17. Have each member of the family make notes for all of the other family members. Inside the notes, write a letter to that family member which includes what you appreciate about that family member. Then seal the envelope and decorate it with stickers. Young family members can draw pictures for each member of the family.

18. Dust off the Christmas Carol CD and play it.

19. Remember to plan a night out with your husband to get to know each other better. Leave the children with a FUN babysitter. Allow the children to order out pizza or go see a movie.

20. Make sure all of your presents are bought and wrapped. Let your child participate in putting together all of the last minute preparations.

21. Decorate your yard for the arrival of relatives.

22. Let your child help you bake the food.

23. Declare the day a NO VIDEO GAMES ALLOWED day. Prepare fun activities for the two of you to do all day.

24. Visit relatives or prepare a fun time together at home.

Whatever activities you plan, they will help both you and your child focus on the fun times you can enjoy in preparation for the holiday season.

Sarah Delaporte is the owner of Freebie Coupon Corner. She loves helping consumers receive free groceries with her helpful e-book publications. If you want to receive free groceries, visit Freebie Coupon Corner at: http://www.couponcorner.net

Online Fan Clubs: Group mechanics, emotional addiction, and separation anxiety

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Online Fan Clubs: Group mechanics, emotional addiction, and separation anxiety
 

Online communication strips emotional cues from conversation: tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language amongst others. This creates anonymity which hastens intimacy. People become bonded in mailing lists. The regular contact creates a sense of a relationship. Real time chats increase the rate of information exchange and the software architecture allows for transposing the event into a book form to be read and digested at a later time.

The virtual neighborhood
Virtual contact promotes support, encouragement, and sharing thus overcomes isolation. The Group becomes the neighborhood, a community, the coffee shop, the Saturday night drag down main street to see and be seen. In groups at first there is the honeymoon period where all is wine and roses, then comes the disenchantment period where the boundaries are tested, and finally there is cohesiveness. Early provocateurs challenge the group leader and then depart to form, sometimes, hostile communities that thrive on fight and flight.

The Fan Club
These fan clubs are the newly identified school yard gangs that are operated by, primarily, cyber bullies. These fan club members had prior been emotionally addicted to the Group they have exited from (exit is either voluntarily or involuntarily). Their detrimental emotional dependence on the Group had been brought on by loneliness, lack of emotional support in their personal lives, lack of self esteem because of lack of socially productive activities. In real life boys tend to use their fists to resolve arguments, and girls tend to use friendship. This trend follows into the Group setting online. You will find that the males tend to flame but remain static on the boards, and the females tend to use flight into cliques on other boards from where they use friendship as a weapon by exclusion and flame from a distance. It is a fascinating phenomenon. When these two types of Group member become hostile they often use language as a weapon rather than to explore ideas. Flaming results from inadequate empathy for other individuals. The solution to flaming is complex but, industry wide, the only real known solution is strong group guides, moderators, and structure.

The anxiety in separation
Once it is determined that the members behavior within the group confines has become detrimental to the Group, and all other avenues have not worked, then the only solution is to remove the member by banning. Then a more interesting phenomenon develops. The banned member, or members then develop a type of severe anxiety separation disorder. They use any means available to re-join the former Group. This can be in the form of volumes of email to the moderators personal email box, the solicitation of continuing members for empathy thru an email campaign, a campaign via Instant Messenger, and sometimes, in the more overt cases, the formation of an online group from which to launch an attack.

The attack can either be in the form of flaming, plans to ostracize of the perceived perpetrator, or repeated vain attempts to circumnavigate the blocked board via spawned ISP addresses or newly created identities. Why is it that members, who had previously expressed sincere displeasure with a Group, would go to such extremes to re-join the group they were previously flaming? This type of separation anxiety is common. Reality is that there are millions of groups out there for these individuals to join. The only one they are seriously concerned about is the one they were just removed/banned from. This separation anxiety can be brief, or can escalate to years of hostility in the online environment.

These fan clubs are quite common. Since most violate the Terms of Service for ISPs as being primarily hate groups they, in short order, find the website removed by the ISP. But, of course, then the group just moves onward and forward to other campsites on the internet sometimes as a group, sometimes as individuals.

Conclusion
Each Group and group member emerges from a cocoon, both different in acquired skills exiting than they entered. The process of initiative and creativity only determines a starting point. Learned life skills determine the balance. The Fan Club is one outcome. There is a more positive one but those involved in this activity rarely grow to solve interpersonal problems as they do not recognize or understand the dynamics that lead them down this path.

Kathleen Johnson

Kathleen Johnson works for Primedia.inc as a moderator on the AllExperts Board for About.Inc. Kathleen also owns multiple Groups on Yahoo and has participated online for many years observing and writing articles on Group dynamics

DANGERS OF DIGITAL DATINGLINDA J ALEXANDER, ESQ

As we enter the new millennium the Internet is evolving into a major meeting ground, one that affords us access to people all over the world and draws us daily into online relationships with individuals we have not yet met. An increasing number of people are using the Internet to meet and get acquainted with potential mates.

While many of those online interactions do bloom into friendships and relationships, a small number do not have happy endings Beth Wadsworth learned this lesson the hard way. When Wadsworth began exchanging emails with Thomas Abney, she thought she, too, might have found love on the Internet. It turns out that what she had really found was a dangerous man who would try to kill her.

Wadsworth met Abney in 1999 while surfing the Web. The two hit it off and began corresponding. "We just started talking and trading information about our lives," says Wadsworth. " We seemed to have the same values and morals."
After only one month of emailing each other, Wadsworth invited her potential new love to visit her. Abney flew to San Diego, where Wadsworth lives, and the two spent some time getting to know each other off-line. Abney wasn't who he appeared to be, however.

When the visit was coming to an end, he turned violent without warning. "He jumped on me and started strangling me," Wadsworth remembers. "I was totally in shock."

When it was over, Abney had attacked Wadsworth with a claw-hammer and slit her throat with a steak knife. He then took Wadsworth's wallet and car keys, leaving her for dead.

"I don't remember being hit, but I had three gashes in my skull," Wadsworth says. "He probably thought I was dead when he left."

Beth wasn't dead, however. She managed to call 911 for help, and Abney was arrested at the airport. He was eventually convicted of premeditated attempted murder, robbery, and auto theft and was sentenced to life plus 14 years in prison.

"I felt pretty stupid that I'd let this stranger into my house, and this is what happened," Wadsworth says. "I will never meet anybody on the Internet again."

While the dangers faced by Wadsworth and other singles aren't unique to online dating, the anonymous nature of the Internet does make it easier for people to be deceptive about who they are.

With the concernsand dangersof meeting others in this manner rising exponentially, it is no surprise that one website has already clicked with millions of netizens: WhoisHe.Com and WhoisShe.Com, a professional service designed to verify if persons are who they purport to be.

Are they married? How old are they? Have they ever used an alias? Are they really a doctor? Do they have any bankruptcies, liens or judgments against them? Do they have a criminal record? Have they committed domestic violence? Are they a registered sexual offender? A pedophile?

Know what you are getting into before you invest your heart, money, or your life, says Linda Alexander, a Southern California attorney and website founder. WhoisHe.Com, which works under the motto, "When in Doubt, Check Them Out," offering background checks, personal profiles, criminal and civil record checks for potential mates, prospective employees, in-home service providers, future step-parents, business partners and nannies. The cost of the service provided by WhoisHe.Com and WhoisShe.Com range from $39 to $75.

"About 60 percent of the time, we find that people aren't telling the truth," Alexander claims. Background checks, criminal and civil record checks are important, according to Alexander, because it's easy to be deceived when looking for love online. "You do not have the same visual cues about someone as when you are face to face with a person," she says. "Somebody behind a computer screen, can be anything they want to be.

You have no idea who's on the other side of that screen. We tell our clients it is important to Be Safe and Be Smart. To take control of your future. Information is the key.
A similar check could have helped Wadsworth. For instance, Abney had told Wadsworth that he had never been married, but Alexander found a civil record for a divorce. Alexander says that background and record checks would have revealed that Abney had lied about many personal details, which might have served as a warning to Wadsworth.

"It tells her that the man is not telling the truth," Alexander asserts. "He's a liar. He has something to hide in his life. I don't know if it tells her that he's going to swing a hammer over her head and that he's going to beat her almost to death, but I think it is enough to say, 'Watch out, red flag, don't let this man in the door.'"

These warning come too late for Wadsworth, who is currently taking a break from romance and the Internet while she works to recover from the physical and emotional wounds she has suffered. "I sleep with the light on every night," she says. "It's affected me."

While more and more singles are turning to the Internet to meet their mates and many online dating stories do have happy endings, it is important to remember that there are dangers to digital love. Wadsworth hopes that what she went through will help to warn others of those dangers.

WhoisHe.Com and WhoisShe.Com has been widely recognized on CBS 48 HOURS" and the CBS Early Show; The Other Half,in People Magazine, listed in Yahoo Internet Life Magazine's top 100 sites for the Year 2000, Seventeen Magazine, Entrepreneur Magazine, Kiplinger Magazine, and USA Today.
Anyone harboring doubts about anyone else can check out the website at http://WhoisHe.Com and at http://WhoisShe.Com and questions can be sent to Admin@WhoisHe.Com or call Linda Alexander, Esq. at 760-806-4377.

LINDA J ALEXANDER, ESQ is an attorney and the President of WhoisHe.Com / WhoisShe.Com. WhoisHe.Com and WhoisShe.Com provides comprehensive background, criminal and civil record checks for employment screening, prospective mates, business partners, nanny checks, in-home service providers, Nanny Checks, future step-parents since 1997. She can be reached at 760-806-4377 or at CheckHimOut@WhoisHe.Com or CheckHerOut@WhoisShe.Com

Depression and Anxiety Disorders

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Depression and Anxiety are two forms of emotional disorders. Depression is a psychological problem which is caused by chemical imbalance in the human brain. Anxiety, on the other hand, is a type of an emotional disturbance caused due to imbalances in the body. In both the conditions, person becomes lethargic and his or her appetite decreases.

Depression and Anxiety disorders have a variety of symptoms. Feelings of hopelessness, negativity, persistent sadness, feeling of guilt, worthlessness, lack of concentration and decreased energy are few symptoms of Depression. The common symptoms of Anxiety are tension about daily problems, emotional tremors, feeling of dying, dizziness, light headedness, nausea, difficulty in breathing and constant fear of loosing control.

Depression and Anxiety disorders affect the life of a person in many ways. The person might get irritated or ill tempered due to Depression and Anxiety. The erratic behavior of the patient can take them away from the social life or friends. This further increases the problem. Many of the adults experience sleep disorders due to Depression and Anxiety. It is because they keep on thinking about the daily happenings or old problems before going to sleep.

Depression and Anxiety disorders can not be fully cured. But, they can be treated with the help of appropriate therapies and medical aid. Anti-Anxiety, Anti-Depressants and many other medications can be prescribed to the patients. The medical practitioners hold consultation sessions to understand the mental condition of the patient. This follows a proper treatment of the patient.

The most effective therapy used in the treatment of Depression and Anxiety disorders is Cognitive Behavior Therapy. Cognitive Behavior Therapy combines two effective types of psychotherapy: Cognitive Therapy and Behavior Therapy. The goal of Behavior Therapy is to weaken the connections between troublesome situations and ones habitual reactions to them. And the aim of Cognitive Therapy is focused on how certain thinking patterns cause or increase emotional reactions. All this helps patients to lower their Depression and Anxiety.

Online entrepreneur Sara Jenkins, is dedicated to helping others and their needs to succeed in life by offering free tips everyday. To learn more about her free tips program, and to sign up for her FREE how-to articles and FREE bonus how-to books and resources, visit www.TipsEveryDay.com